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Sunday, December 17, 2023

DECEMBER 2023 -- Troubles for Saint Nick

 

© LJR 2023

  TROUBLES FOR SAINT NICK

 Jolly old Saint Nicholas

Lean your ear this way

It seems a warrant for your arrest

Has brought us into court today

The FAA accuses you of flying

With no flight plan in the queue

Plus you lack a pilot’s license

 And an airborne sleigh just will not do

As for Homeland, they’ve voiced grave concerns

About you crossing borders willy-nilly

For you seem to think a passport

Is both unneeded and quite silly

The IRS can find no tax returns

Under any of your many names

While your use of tiny reindeer

Troubles the folks at Fish and Game

Local police label you a voyeur

“He sees you when you’re sleeping”

Not to mention all those videos

Where nanny-cams have caught you creeping

Yes, old Saint Nick, I sadly fear

You are headed to the pen

Unless a Christmas miracle

Happens between now and then

My advice as your attorney

Is to make the judge and jury think

Of all those disappointed children

If Santa Claus ends up in the clink

Yes, if Christmas cheer is threatened

I think we may just win this case

And you can resume your mission

Putting smiles on every kiddie’s face

 


 

 

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